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Cloistered

My Years as a Nun

Audiobook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

This program is read by the author.
"A profoundly moving memoir which gripped me . . . It's about spirituality and asceticism and silence and sisterhood, but also about how flawed human beings can abuse power and how hermetically sealed communities, which should care for and protect their members, can be dangerously vulnerable to threats from inside their walls." - Mark Haddon, author of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime, The Porpoise and others


An astonishing memoir of twelve years as a contemplative nun in a silent monastery.

Cloistered
takes the reader deep into the hidden world of a traditional Carmelite monastery as it approaches the third Millennium and tells the story of an intense personal journey into and out of an enclosed life of poverty, chastity, and obedience. Finding an apparently perfect world at Akenside Priory, in Northumberland, Catherine trusts herself to a group of twenty silent women, believing she is trusting herself to God. As the beauty and mystery of an ancient way of life enfold her, she surrenders herself wholly to its power, quite unaware of the complexity and dangers that lie ahead.
Cut off from the wider world for decades, the community has managed to evade accountability to any authority beyond itself. When Sister Catherine realises that a mesmerising cult of the personality, with the distortions it entails, has replaced the ancient ideal of religious obedience, she is faced with a dilemma. Will she submit to this, or will she be forced to speak out?
An exploration of the limits of trust, Cloistered shows us how far youthful idealism can take us along the road of self-surrender, and of how much harm is done when institutional flaws go unacknowledged. Catherine's honest account of her time in the monastery – and her dramatic flight from it – is both a love song to a lost community and an exploration of what is most compelling, yet most potentially destructive when closed human groups become laws unto themselves.
A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin's Press.

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    • Publisher's Weekly

      Starred review from January 29, 2024
      In this penetrating debut memoir, former nun Coldstream describes her 12 years in an English priory and the circumstances that led to her eventual departure. Raised in an emotionally chilly family, Coldstream became bereft at age 24 when her elderly father died. After involving herself with various religious groups in an effort to aid her “long passage... across unfamiliar landscape” of grief, Coldstream found comfort in silent prayer at northern England’s Akenside Priory. Inspired by the discipline and ritual she encountered there, Coldstream joined the mostly silent nuns’ ranks. As time wore on, however, her “hospital for wounded souls” turned icy and toxic, with infighting, big egos, and power struggles troubling the waters in which Coldstream initially found solace. After her conflicts with her fellow nuns reached a fever pitch over the course of a decade, the author fled the cloister in the middle of the night. In lyrical, evocative prose (“Time passes in the monastery like ghosts that move through walls; it seeps through cell doors and stony archways, through bone and marrow, imprinting patience and endurance at every touch”), Coldstream opens a window into a reclusive culture, resolutely exposing its problems without losing sight of its virtues. The results will fascinate believers and non-believers alike. Agent: Patrick Walsh, PEW Literary.

    • AudioFile Magazine
      Catherine Coldstream didn't start out as a devout person, but after her father's death, she sought to make a major change in her life. So she converted to Catholicism and entered a traditional Carmelite monastery as a nun. Coldstream narrates this memoir detailing her transition from a secular life to the religious order. Her British-accented narration has tonal variation but still somehow sounds a bit colorless as she describes the habits, daily rituals, and personalities of the nuns. She describes the conformity--the "becoming as one"--and then the alliances and schisms that developed within the group that led her to leave the order after concluding its atmosphere was toxic. Unadorned violin music bookends the production, a fitting complement to the memoir. S.E.G. © AudioFile 2024, Portland, Maine

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  • English

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